165

it's been two years, now.
it's time for new beginnings.

thiamin mononitrate

the fact that it is so easy and so hard to go back and forth worries me more than almost anything

i know what i want
and i know i won't get it

pick the poison

it frightens me how naive i have been and continue to be.
it frightens me that i am so unable to be open with anyone.
it frightens me knowing i have the power to throw it all away.

if things were different, if i were a different person, if i had a different body and face, i would be perfectly okay with failing classes, drinking and smoking, skipping school and doing whatever i want.

if things were different, of course.
but they're not, but i could still do that.

and mainly, i know it's my own fault, but why is it that it seems i get 90% of what i want before it's taken away?
examples would be relevant but far too revealing.

i wish i could write
i can't remember how to put my feelings into words
everything changed, really
numbers make more sense than words now
it makes me want to cry

denoted

nothing is secret. nothing is hidden.

eVeRyOnE wIlL bE fOuNd OuT
(soon)

ironically infinite

i love/hate/miss everyone
especially you

and some people are just so good at making it seem as if they're singling you out when they're not even talking to you

wish i could share my joy with the world
it's priceless wealth

so sick of the people i love being down
not so sick of the people i love

i'm getting bored of words that everyone's already heard
i wanna make it big

roots radicals

i didn't know reading that would hurt me so bad
i didn't realize i'm still so vulnerable

jesus christ, i hate remembering

what makes you so special?

i don't believe you anymore
but i'm becoming increasingly okay with it.

this nice thing is, this doesn't scare me anymore.